Published on: 8 October 2026
“I can’t change what happened to my friend, and I will always carry that loss with me. But I can turn the pain into purpose and become the best mental health nurse I can be.”
These are the words of Derbyshire Healthcare NHS Trust student nurse associate Olivia Bedford who lost a friend to suicide three years ago.
Ahead of World Mental Health Day on Saturday (10 October), Olivia felt the time was right to tell her story.
The pair met through dancing classes and spent their childhood and teens performing on stage together, forming a very close bond.
“When I heard she had gone, I couldn’t believe it,” she said. “It was my 18th birthday on the Wednesday and we’d been planning my party for the Friday. I had no idea she was feeling that way.
“She was an amazing friend, so supportive and always checked in on others.”
Olivia, who works on Bluebell Ward in Chesterfield, said the two were so close that when they danced together on stage, it was as if nobody else was there.
“You always get butterflies before you go on stage, but when you know you have that support from your friend you feel like you are the only ones on the stage,” she said. “It gives you strength and you don’t get so nervous.”
Olivia, 20, had always wanted to go into nursing, but losing her friend gave her the passion for helping those struggling with their mental health.
“I had thought I would go into general nursing but after that happened came the passion for mental health,” she said. “At the moment I am working with older adults but eventually I want to work with working age adults, specialising in personality disorders.
“I love the fact that I am making a difference, and that a really small thing can really help someone. Some people struggling with their mental health can neglect things like their self care, so I love being able to sit with them and just brush their hair, or plait it, and help them take little steps towards feeling better.”
Olivia added: “I can’t change what happened to my friend and I will always carry that loss with me. But I can turn the pain into purpose. I’m determined to become the best mental health nurse I can be — for the people I will care for, for the people who feel unheard, and in memory of the person who gave me one of the biggest reasons to keep going with my dream.”
